Friday Fun: So Hip it Hurts!

What's more fun on a Friday afternoon than mocking hipsters? Enjoy!
























"Don’t you wish this guy wrote the DOs & DON’Ts instead of some wrinkly, rat-faced Canadian with an ironic moustache?"
Vice Magazine Dos and Don'ts


















"wouldn't it be more of an act of rebellion if you didn't spend so much time buying blue hair dye and going out to get punky clothes? it seems so petty. stop me if I'm being offensive. you wanna be an individual, right? you look like you're wearing a uniform. you look like a punk. that's not rebellion. that's fashion." -SLC Punk
Your Scene Sucks!


















"She's been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
Blue States Lose


Quiz: what species of hipster are you?


Why Hipsters Suck

Spotted: Kensington Street Art

Great street art spotted by Paul over at BlogTO. Love this stuff! Looking for more? Check it:

Toronto Flickr Street Art Group
The Legendary Banksy
Street Art PhotoBlog
mcstrick
Bomit
Wooster Collective
Streetsy

Capturing Romance

I Stumble!'d across the portfolio for wedding/couple photographer Jesh de Rox today. Never before have I seen a photographer that could capture the human spirit in all its beauty quite like this. Jesh de Rox is a truly gifted artist and I urge you to take a moment to check out his work... You will be better off because of it.

FauxTastic!

Don't get me wrong, Grindhouse was great but the real treat were the faux trailers. Thanks to the magic of YouTube, you can enjoy them again without a ticket! Click on the titles to view videos... Pure genius!

Hobo With a Shotgun
Director: Jason Eisener
Starring: David Brunt, Mike Jackson

Machete
Director: Robert Rodriguez
Starring: Danny Trejo and Cheech Marin

Werewolf Women of the S.S.
Director: Rob Zombie
Starring: Nicolas Cage, Udo Kier, and Sheri Moon

Don't
Director: Edgar Wright
Starring: Jason Isaacs, Matthew MacFadyen, and Katie Melua

Thanksgiving
Director: Eli Roth
Starring: Jeff Rendell, Jordan Ladd, Jay Hernandez, and Eli Roth

Catch Her If You Can

It would seem my girl, Belinda Stronach, doesn't know what she wants anymore. In just a short amount of time, Belinda left her post at Daddy's auto empire, joined the Conservative Party of Canada, left the Conservative Party of Canada, joined the Liberal Party of Canada, and just yesterday, announced that she is returning to Daddy's auto empire. And that's just her professional life. In the same period of time, she has been linked to ex-Chicago Black Hawks defenceman Jerome Dupont, Montreal Alouettes defensive end Marc Megna, Minister of Foreign Affairs Peter Mackay, Toronto Maple Leafs goon Tie Domi, and most recently Bill Clinton. Although her contribution to Canadian politics is debatable, there's no question she brought some much needed Pazazz to the typically stodgy scene. Who's going to step up and bring the sex appeal back to Parliament? Belinda, we'll miss you!

Hello America. My Name is Football...

{Disclaimer} Despite being the world's most popular sport, I am going to refer to football as soccer for the duration of this post because that is what we like to call it and the rest of the planet's terminology doesn't really matter {/Disclaimer}

It's not often you'll find me writing about sports over here at One Five Place but I just borrowed a great movie from Dino that sparked my interest. Once in a Lifetime: The Extraordinary Story of the New York Cosmos does a great job documenting the rise and fall of the North American Soccer League through the eyes of the once legendary New York Cosmos. I'll do my best to summarize for those of you unfamiliar with the story but you really should check out the movie as I'll never be able to do it justice. It all basically started with a dream from a few Warner executives and a handful of optimistic yet naive investors. To say the league started off with little fanfare or public interest would be an understatement. To put things into perspective, at this point in time, the majority of North Americans didn't even know how to spell "soccer" (and no, that wasn't a swing at our wonderful education system). In order to make this thing take off, the founders were smart enough to realize that they needed to find a real star; an extraordinarily difficult task considering there were no real soccer players in the country at the time.

Enter Pele. Coming off his last year playing in Brazil, Pele was seduced to America with a offer to play for the New York Cosmos and an unheard of contract somewhere in the range of 4 - 5 million dollars. This would make him by far the highest paid athlete in America and it's no surprise that the country took notice. Other teams in the league quickly followed suit and began importing the greatest players from around the world. It's ironic to note that this single action resulted in the rise of the game in both the public and media's eyes but was also the main factor for its' collapse. The market just wasn't ready to support the capital required to sustain these high profile players and super stadiums and would very quickly collapse under the pressure. The final blow came from network television (surprise, surprise!) after they pulled the plug on the game due to low ratings. And that was it. With a lifespan no greater that that of a bull frog, the dream was over; soccer in North America was officially dead.

Now, It's nothing new to claim that North America is an ignorantly isolated and self centric continent (I apologize for grouping Canada into this sweeping generalization but unfortunately we do tend to pick up some of the less than faltering characteristics of our friends to the south) but why hasn't soccer been able to grow? I could spend the rest of the night coming up with explanations as to why it has not but being the forward-thinking idealist I am (or would like to be), I would rather look at reasons why it still could. Here are my thoughts:

1.) Major League Soccer - Formed in 1993, this is a much more organized and well managed league than before and with the addition of our very own Toronto FC, it now has 13 clubs in 13 solid markets with attendance climbing every day.

2.) David Beckham - Say what you want about the man but you can't deny that he is a star. By no means in the same sense as Pele was but a star in every way. I would even go as far as to say that he is our generation's equivalent given our current "style over substance" cultural state of mind. His marriage to Posh Spice and celebrity jet setting ways have already peaked our interest in the sport and now he will be playing in our league.

3.) Niche Television - The television market is very different now than it was in the late 70's and the opportunity for soccer has never been better. In fact, 70% of MLS games this year will be broadcast on network television with the remaining available via subscription.

4.) Highly Targeted Advertising - As audiences become increasingly segmented and marketers become increasingly sophisticated, the niche market has never been so attractive. It wouldn't be out of the ordinary for seemingly mass media advertisers to go after a market as targeted as this. Thus creating a constant revenue stream for the league and the broadcasters.

5.) Immigration - With more and more families coming to North America from countries where soccer is a fact of life, it won't take long for their influence to weave itself into our culture. Plus, just think of all the children of immigrates that will grow up and dream of becoming famous North American soccer players rather than baseball, hockey, or football.

6.) The Internet - The world wide web has made access to information so easy that we don't have to rely on a single network executive to spoon feed us our entertainment. At any time, day or night, we have the ability to check scores, watch live feeds, review highlights, etc. all from the comfort of our homes.

As you can see, the opportunity for soccer in North America has never been greater and I hope the sport finally receives the attention, respect, and passion it deserves as it truly is a beautiful game.

image via theoriginaltony

Desktop Voyeurism

Bored of webcams, Facebook, and MySpace? Here are some great new ways to satisfy your voyeuristic spirit from the comfort of your own desktop. What better way to kick off a dreary Thursday morning?

















via Found Magazine













via Overheard Everywhere













via Group Hug



















via Twitter Confession



















via What's in Your Bag Flickr feed



















via Post Secret

Al Gore is Cooler Than You!

With a little help from his friends, former U.S. Vice President Al Gore is throwing a party and you're invited! (unless of course you reside in Canada... I'm a little bit disappointed about this but I'm going to chalk it up to Canadians being more socially and environmentally aware than our neighbours...) Live Earth will be happening on 07-07-07 and will feature 07 concerts across 07 continents. Here's an excerpt from a press release:

"Live Earth will use the global reach of music to engage people on a mass scale to combat our climate crisis. Live Earth will bring together more than 150 of the world's top musicians for 24-hours of music from 7 concerts across all 7 continents. Live Earth will bring together an audience of more than 2 billion at the concerts and through television, radio, film, and the Internet. That audience, and the proceeds from the event, will create the foundation for a new, multi-year global effort to combat the climate crisis led by Vice President Al Gore. Kevin Wall, Worldwide Executive Producer of Live 8, is producing Live Earth."

And if you're still not convinced Global Warming is a real and immediate concern, please take a look here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here. Oh, and WAKE THE F$%K UP!!!

Meet the World

Here's a series of brilliant ads created for the Portuguese news magazine "Grande Reportagem". Apparently this campaign was launched in 2005 but this is the first I have seen of it. Just thought I would share in case, like me, you missed it. Read more here.

Geek Review: e-DENTITY

What would you get if your grandmother tried to explain the Internet through a multimedia theatre performance? You would get e-DENTITY - the latest Mirvish production to hit the Royal Alexandra Theatre. Although visually stimulating, this show contained nothing more than tired cliches, dated references to web 1.0 and uninteresting commentary on human behaviour. Oh, and not to mention really, really bad techno music. This production was basically the equivalent of Peter Mansbridge exploring the relevance of the Montreal indie rock scene. Rather than taking you "inside the virtual world, into the digital landscape and down its myriad, ever-shifting, ever-forking paths" as the program describes, e-Dentity only rehashes obsolete stereotypes about the Internet that even the most unsavvy of web users would dismiss. For all its short falls, I can however say that the innovative use of lighting, video projection, live action, and sound prevented this from being a complete waste of time.

Although the writers were careful to include a few web 2.0 references, they seemed contrived and completely out of context. I wouldn't be surprised if they were added to the script 2 days before showtime. I realize I am sounding a tad e-tentious but this was truly an uninspired attempt to explore technology's effects on human interaction, sociology, and evolution. I would consider this more of an ode to the Internet circa 1998 than anything else. With all said and done, my main objection to e-DENTITY was its failure to recognize the fact that the Internet has moved far beyond anonymous chat, cybersex, and webcams. Unless you are feeling nostalgic for the days you spent chatting on IRC, I would wait for this performance to show up on YouTube.

Weird Al(anis)?

Check out Alanis Morissette's hilariously melodramatic cover of the Black Eyed Peas hit "My Humps". Although not normally a fan of the Canadian songstress, Alanis does an excellent job pointing out what's wrong with the world of pop music (yes, those are the actual lyrics).

Which One of These Does Not Belong?

Just for kicks, I thought I would take CBC's Test the Nation IQ Test tonight (scored 121 in case you were wondering) and couldn't help but laugh at Quaker's ridiculous attempt at brand integration. Prior to taking the test, you are asked a series of questions such as age, sex, location etc. to help the program calculate your score. There are also some not so relevant questions such as hair colour, favourite spectator sport, alcohol preference, etc. that I assume will be used as interesting cross-references once the database has been populated (i.e. Blonde's have the highest average IQ, Alberta is the smartest Provence, Beer drinkers are stupid, etc..). However, the very last question of "are you trying to lower your cholesterol levels?" comes completely out of left field and is generously brought to us by Quaker Oats. WTF? Now I'm all for brand integration but this is just silly. What relevance could this possibly have to an IQ test? I would be very curious to see how Quaker is going to use this information... I can just picture their marketing team huddled around pages of fancy graphs in a stuffy neutral coloured board room trying to figure what to do now that they know the average IQ of someone trying to lower their cholesterol. Am I missing something here?